Last updated on February 13, 2025
I almost became a covert to Hinduism today when it became very apparent that Machiavelli, who is recorded as dying in Florence in 1527, appeared to be very much alive and in our midst at Temple today. Some of you, even if not intending to play, will have read some of the email traffic between RobertM and Alan concerning the rules for today’s game and worrying if some, hitherto unpublished, unpleasant Machiavellian traits in behaviour might be manifested during today’s golf game. As it turned out, despite his alleged misgivings, Robert clearly decided to go to the dark side and, sadly, he was not alone but then anybody with core training from Master Owen Green might struggle to leave the dark side at all.
Alan’s rules gave each of of the three of us 6 reverse Mulligans to be used anytime we wanted across the 18 holes. You had to use 3 Mulligans on each of the two opponents. The three players were Robert, MikeS and myself. We hadn’t left the first tee before the stench of rat was noticeable.
Mike and I had driven reasonably OK to come to rest near the right-hand 150 yard marker. Robert had hooked his drive perhaps into the lower trees on the left or perhaps into the dell. At this point Mike asked Robert if he would like to take it again. “Pardon” says I, “Robert is already in trouble and we do not need to bother about him”. “Ah” says Mike ” He may produce something much better which would suit “our” purposes very well”.
Alan was walking round with us as Referee and even he looked somewhat abashed by this turn of events. It would seem that Mike and RobertM had formed an unholy alliance with the sole aim of defeating myself. Essentially they had 12 Mulligans between them against my 6 which was not how Alan had seen things but they were within a Trump-like interpretation of the rules.
On the 2nd hole after I had hit passable straight drive up the middle, one of them invited me to take the shot again and I am pleased to report that my next drive was virtually hugging my first effort much to their irritation. After Robert had scored 4 points on the first 5 holes, slightly courtesy of me asking him to take a couple of approach shots again, I realised that my primary target had to be Mike so I sympathetically allowed Robert his 4-pointer on the 6th in the vain hope that he might change sides but no such luck!
Mike got 3 points on the 6th and 7th and there was no point in those holes where I thought it worthwhile to ask him to re-take the shot and he went into a 2-point lead. However when he screwed up the 8th, it was down to a 1-shot lead. And then on the 9th we both left our 3rd shots about 12 feet from the front of the green. I asked him to re-take his and he unfortunately put this one onto the green. I chipped to about 4 feet from the hole and they asked me to re-take it so I put the next one within the putter handle and went off with a mirk as Mike 3-putted to give is a dead heat on 16 points each with Robert on 11.
I carelessly missed a golden opportunity to ask Mike to play again when he hit a laser-like 3-wood onto the 10th green but I only had one Mulligan left in my ammo belt as far as Mike was concerned. I put my 80 yard wedge about 4 feet below the hole and when we got up there they were strongly minded to send me back to re-take the shot but I pointed out that that would upset the 2-ball just behind us and the Referee ruled that it was too late. Irritatingly Mike sunk his putt for 4 for 4 points while I missed mine and had 5 for 2.
On the 13th I sunk a 20 yard putt from the back of the green for a par but they invited me to re-take it and, seeing that lightning does not strike twice, I missed the second one.
The same happened on the 16th where I sank an 8-footer and then missed the re-take – by now the two of them were beaming like Cheshire Cats and Mike held a 2-point lead courtesy of the putts they had invited me to re-take. As we stood on the 18th tee, Robert had not used any of the 3 Mulligans he was supposed to use to sabotage Mike. However I had one left and when Mike put his second shot onto the green, I asked him to re-take it and he put this version high on the bank above the hole. I had put my second shot about 4 feet from the pin but because Robert could not see it, he had not asked me to re-take it until it was too late to ask despite the fact he had one such Mulligan left.
And now the full extent of their cunning plan was revealed – if he had played golf, Machiavelli would have been proud of it himself.
Mike’s first attempt down onto the green was way off line so Robert invited him to take it again and the second shot was much better leaving him a 6 foot putt. When he missed, Robert used another Mulligan to give him a second go and then again and finally he sank it for a 4 for 3. And despite me sinking mine for a 3 for 4, Mike won the back 9 and overall by a a single point. As the pair of them left the green, I distinctly heard them discussing whether it was 1 or 2 bottles of wine that Mike owed Robert!
This format has to be repeated and it would be good in pairs with no holds barred. Revenge will be sweet indeed.
Many thanks are due to our Referee whose very presence ensured that no blood was spilt.
The final scores were:
Mike (35), Richard(34) and Robert (24).
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