Swallow spotted at Temple

From our locum correspondent:

“The weather forecast for play today was relatively benign. So having been used throughout January to a huge drop out rate amongst those who had ticked “available” a name was surreptitiously added late on Tuesday evening. This could be regarded as the Ballbasher equivalent of the  first swallow of Spring. In our case our swallow was Pete Forester!

In fact the weather forecast had sneakily dropped on Tuesday to forecasting slightly chillier weather and it was not long before Swallow Pete (along with many) others was adding several layers of clothes. This was not surprising as I am sure the clothes he arrived in today were the same as  he wore last August with a warm sun shining!

One aspect of Ballbasher golf we know little about is pre-match routines that  different members use. We ,of course, have seen Stuart on the first tee try to psyche us out with a full routine of touching toes, swinging his shoulders and general adopting the full Canadian Air Force programme to ensure that he can fulfil his normal 420 degree swing. But what of the others? Well I had noticed last week that at  9am when I was checking who was playing Nick’s availability suddenly turned to NO. Aha I thought- wimp- it’s too cold for him. I now apologise profusely for this ill judged and unfair comment. I saw Nick during the week and he explained to me he had been on his exercise bike warming up for the day’s golf demands when he went and strained something and had had to withdraw.

This leads neatly on to Robert who said to me as he left the eighteenth green last week that he had to give himself a good talking to and go and practice at Harleyford(that seems to his practice club). When he arrived today it transpired that he had not made it to Harleyford but had gone on his simulator for a bit on waking up this morning. It had not been good and he was apprehensive about his golf today. Rightly so as far as the first tee was concerned as both his drives were very wayward and went in the trees on the left. Strangely his partner Pete (who also has a simulator) had the same issue. By this time Mike S and I who were matched against them were getting anxious that if they were going to hit four balls every time for our two we could get very cold indeed.

Anyway enough about the golf other than to say that, with seven people, the three in buggies- the buggy boys(Roger, Bill and Nick)- went out first and set a cracking pace- speed not golf! Two two-balls walked behind- Mike S and Alan with Robert and Pete. It is believed that everyone enjoyed their round and the only excitement was at the eighteenth when Mike S did a beautiful drive but then put his next shot in the righthand greenside bunker via almost taking out Robert. While the other three stood on the green waiting to putt only the very top of Mike’s head was visible and this bobbed up and down a little over a considerable period accompanied by swishing noises. Eventually Mike appeared and explained it was a blob. It is highly unusual for Mike not to extricate himself  from a bunker. But his mood remained positive.

I should mention at this point that obviously the buggy boys were playing off three quarters handicap plus 1. We were very fortunate to have our Distinguished Handicapping Secretary available to carry out this demanding calculation. As one of the leading venture capitalists not to mention private equity players it was educational to watch him for each individual take half their handicap then half it again before adding the two halves together, totalling them up and adding 1. Hopefully we shall all benefit from this technique the faced with such a challenge in the future

We moved on to lunch. This time there no lunch-only attendees but they may want to come in the future as there was a very lively noir to mention loud debate on a wide range of topics such as immigration(have the Saudis got it right?), Scottish independence and Nicola Sturgeon”s speedy demise, Regenerative AI( search me!) and needless to say The King’s health and Harry’s PR exercise in flying in.

So finally to the golf results.

As far as the team games were concerned the Buggy Boys scored 13 going out and 16 coming back in- a total of 29. Pete and Robert had 17 on both sessions giving a total of 34 while Mike S and Alan went out in 22 and back in 19 a total of 41 so they win all the bash coins.  As far as the Frostbite league goes, the scores were Alan 33, Mike S 32, Robert 28, Pete 26 , Bill 25, Roger 22 and Nick 21.”