You will be relieved to learn that this report will be shorter than normal because I need to pack and find my passport as we are off to Newcastle tomorrow.
Today we played for the Farnham Putter – this is a Tom Morris St Andrews hand-forged vintage putter which has somehow acquired a steel shaft along the way. At least one presumes that it was originally hickory but perhaps Tom Morris despite his mammoth grey beard was an innovator after all.
The novel format specifies that we are only allowed 6 clubs + putter. For the majority of us who usually carry 14 clubs this presents a dilemma as to which 7 to leave out. We then spend 18 holes bemoaning that we are having to play a shot with completely the wrong club and this can lead to a form of temporary insanity whereby one attempts to play a driver from underneath a tree where the ball has come to rest.
The one player who is not affected by this at all is Alan who normally carries 6 clubs + putter round the course and, as a result, was not confronted by any of the problems that the rest of us conjured up. He is used to making-do with his small selection or perhaps he always hits the ball to the precise distance for his next club. He certainly made it look easy today.
I was fortunate in that the balls fell so that I was partnered with Alan and , this week, following my 2 shot cut in handicap, I lost the ability to play as though I was suffering from a bad back with a swing speed equal to Alan’s and found myself in all sorts of trouble., I had debated the inclusion of my sand wedge but I was pleased that I did because it was almost the busiest club in my bag.
Alan and I were paired up with the two Mikes (S & W). Last week MikeW lost 8 balls in the water and even today, with just one pond on the entire course, he still contrived to lose a ball in it. By the 6th hole he had lost 3 balls, found one and used it only to discover that it was split so threw that away thereby making 4 lost balls. Despite this handicap the two Mikes put up a powerful defence against Alan’s serene scoring and after a ding-dong battle we were 2 points ahead of them after 9 holes 24 to 22. I had contributed a total of 4 points to our score but at least they made a difference.
The back 9 continued in similar vein with Alan gently swinging his way down the centre of the course while the rest of us wondered why we had left the 3-wood, 5-iron, 7-iron or golfing brain behind in the boot of the car. MikeW unfortunately stopped losing balls and I just got worse and worse and they managed to pip us by one point which luckily gave us an overall victory against them.
Behind us the other 2 pairs were PeterR & Nick playing with Bill and JohnS. Nick was making his first attempt to walk rather than ride in the buggy for about 12 months. He had said beforehand that he might only make 9 holes and that proved to be the case so they became a 3-ball for the back 9. They claimed that, with Nick’s departure, they had lost their spiritual leader and their scoring had suffered as a result.
A jolly chat ensued on the terrace in which Bill came up with the novel idea that, since his handicap was not proving to be of great benefit to him, he might trying selling chunks of it to other BBs for a handsome number of BashCoins. Luckily the Mighty Wurlitzer has no capability for handling such transactions so BBs should be aware that, if approached, this is very definitely a scam originating unusually from Hawaii.
Alan triumphantly carried off the Farnham Putter to put on hooks already installed in his trophy room. The scores were as follows:
Alan (38), MikeS (36), Richard (30), PeterR (29), MikeW (25 – a 50% improvement on last week), Bill (23), JohnS (17) and Nick (unrecorded).
Team Scores:
Alan & Richard 24 + 20 = 44
MikeS & MikeW 22 + 21 = 43
Nick & PeterR 18
Bill & JohnS 17
Bill, JohnS & PeterR 17
NPin2 balls were won by JohnS, Richard & MikeW.
