Playing golf in a washing machine

I am sure that Churchill would have contrived a superb piece of phrasing to describe the courage shown by 10 Ballbashers today endeavouring to play a medal round in something akin to a typhoon – those that were there will find nobody at home interested in hearing of their experiences in the fields of Badgemore – there is after all the dishwasher to be emptied. Fortunately we were able to agree before we set off that the maximum score on any hole would be capped at 4 strokes over par otherwise there may well have been Ballbashers still out there in the dark trying to finish off the front 9 in a snorkel and flippers.

We only play one medal round per year and we play for the magnificent Medal Vase which is possibly, even probably, the only trophy in our cabinet that might be found in a self-respecting golf club’s trophy cabinet and I think that is where it originated though I have forgotten how it got into our hands in 2009.

After Bill suggested that the 4 Buggy Boys – himself, Nick, Roger and JohnH – should play as the last group, the balls were thrown such that Alan, PeterR and myself were one team and were followed by MikeS, JohnS and RobM. The individual winner would be the one with the lowest nett score and the winning team would be the one with the lowest average nett score. That was easier to write than to explain on the 1st tee but after a couple of minutes most had gathered the gist and we set off into the wind and, at that stage, no rain.

Badgemore has the huge advantage of being quite flat with no nasty tilts to one side or the other and quite wide. It was also very green and the greens themselves were quite slow due to the moisture and even slower when deluged upon so it was not an unfriendly environment in which the Ballbashers could exorcise their medal demons.

The three of us set of at a good pace and soon left the rest of our group far behind eventually to briefly catch up with the group in front but they then disappeared after 9 holes during which they had obviously consulted the seaweed to see what was coming.

When we reached the 9th tee we met up with the 4 Buggy Boys who were just coming onto the 7th next door – these 2 holes cross over each other. Bill was initially confused by our presence and waved his arms and shouted at us to get off his tee. Luckily for long-term BB relationships we were soon able to smooth this over and told them where to go so-to-speak. We drove off first crossing their fairway but we were soon overtaken by JohnH’s ball coming down ours – nobody was harmed and he was left with an impossible shot over the top of the woods which we did not hang around to observe.

After a brief stop at the Halfway Hut we set off up the back 9 and at this point the rain started to gear up. Halfway up the 11th we were welcomed by a deep rumble of thunder but we heard no klaxon to call us off the course and it was looking brighter so we continued. At this point Bill appeared in his buggy on his own and told us that the other 3 Buggy Boys had retired to the clubhouse after 9 holes to wring themselves out and asked what our plans were – apparently the 3-ball behind us were keen to carry on so as it was n’t actually raining, we decided to carry on as well. Bill disappeared to join the 3-ball behind us as he wanted his money’s worth as well.

The 12th was a Par 4 selected for the 3rd NPin2 hole and I managed to put my 2nd shot about 6 feet from the pin. The rain was now firmer so, suspecting that other BBs may not reach this far-flung part of the course and not keen to lose one of our handsome NP markers, I just marked my position with an orange tee which, somewhat akin to JohnT’s marker left optimistically on the fairway of the 7th hole at Tavira when we summoned to the clubhouse in a mighty thunderstorm, is definitely still there.

Just as I was observing to my partners on the 13th green that we seemed to be right on the edge of the boundary between the deep black clouds and the much lighter ones and we might stay dry, someone up there started pouring giant buckets of water downwards over us. At that point we decided that enough was enough and set off home to the clubhouse encountering the 3-ball (now 4 with Bill) on the 11th. Being proud (and possibly daft) Ballbashers they declared that they would finish the 11th even though they would putt through standing water and then follow us in.

Back in the clubhouse we found the 3 Buggy Boys now totally relaxed being no longer in danger of drowning as they went down with their buggy and Nick was deep into investigating the unlikelyu presence of apple strudel on the bar.

Strangely enough everyone seemed very happy – perhaps that is the feeling after surviving a life-threatening episode – and the nett scores were very tight. This is a good omen for next week when it will be hand-to-hand fighting for the Ryder Cup in Dorset.

The competition was limited to the first 9 holes and the individual scores for the Medal Vase were:
Richard (38), JohnH, JohnS and RobM (40), Alan and MikeS (44), Nick, Roger & Bill (45) and Peter (46).

The team scores were:
MikeS, JohnS & RobM (41.33), Alan, PeterR & Richard (42.66) and the Buggy Boys (43.75).

The NPin2 balls were won by JohnH and Richard.

Thanks to Peter for organising the day which appeared to be enjoyed by everyone – strange creatures us Ballashers.